Family Friday (vol. 40): I lost my cool…completely.

“Our children are trying to kill us…”

That’s what I groaned to Mark as I angrily pried myself from bed at 6:20am this morning. I went to bed with wishful thinking that I’d be in bed come 7am and I might get through the night with only one wake-up call. Wrong. Piper was wanting to nurse the second my head hit the pillow it seemed (11pm). And then at 3am. And up at 6:20am. Fine. Not great, but I’ll live. It was the 3 visits into Shea’s room as she screamed for the most random reasons – one time thinking she lost a sticker (what sticker, dude?) and once because the tower of books in the corner of her crib fell over (duh, yo!). The 3rd visit was at 5:20am when she was up for the day (!?) and the cherry on top – the dog coming up to be let out at 6:25am.

Some days are marathons.

So, today was the day I has designated as “POTTY TRAINING DAY!” and this weekend, “POTTY TRAINING WEEKEND!” I thought we started strong after one little accident, but we quickly went through all 6 pairs of Minnie Mouse panties and had multiple accidents on carpet.

Things got even better when Shea was sitting in Piper’s (cloth) glider and she just had that look about her.

“Shea, do you need to go potty?” …”NO!”…”Shea, let’s go sit on the potty!”…”NO!”….”Shea, I think you need to go potty, c’mon baby.”…

PEE. Everywhere.

I lost it, you guys. My voice hurts from screaming and I did what I never, ever, ever, ever, ever thought I’d do in a million years – I gave her a little spank. Cue all the tears and mommy guilt.

She went to sob uncontrollably in her room as I cleaned up and Piper continuously rolled from back to belly only to get downright MAD within seconds every time. I return to cleaning, Piper rolls over, I rescue her a moment later…rinse, repeat. I cried. I was so frustrated with the situation and downright disgusted with my loss of control with Shea. I hated myself in that moment. After we both calmed down, I pulled her to me, hugged, kissed, and explained in a loving tone why I was so upset. I told her that mommy was wrong and that hands are for gentle touches. And I asked her to forgive me to which she quickly replied, “Ya. Mommy sorry. Love me.” Once again, cue all the tears.

I learned in a leadership course yesterday that patience is my biggest weakness as a leader. But I’m ashamed to say that that weakness spills over into my home life and with my beautiful girls.

It’s 1:41pm, and the girls just blessed me with 1 hour and 35 minutes of quiet – both asleep at the same time. I took a mental health trip to the treadmill, showered, and am finally eating lunch while confessing my potty training failures on my little corner of the web. But, I need to go get my little Piper who just awoke.

Please tell me I’m not a horrible parent! Or, please help me become a better parent and make it through tough days and challenges like potty training. Please give me pointers on how to remain patient and to see the world in the eyes of a little person so that I can be more patient and show much more grace. <3 Woof. This parenting stuff ain’t easy.

Be well,

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14 Comments

  1. Becca
    February 3, 2017 / 4:41 pm

    Thank you for sharing!!! I’m not a mom yet (but will be in 6 weeks if he’s on time!) and knowing my patience with our dog, I expect I will be in this situation in the very near future. I think your openness and honesty is what moms need more of. No advice here, sorry! But I like to think all moms (or dog moms) get impatient sometime and we just have to do better next time. It sounds like you did the right thing in apologizing and explaining your reaction. Hope the rest of your weekend goes better!!

    • Nicole Morrissey
      Author
      February 8, 2017 / 8:59 pm

      Thank you, Becca! Being a dog mom isn’t easy either! I hope your 4-legger sleeps through the night because mine doesn’t most nights! What is the deal!? Haha!! And you are a mom – just awaiting your baby to be an outside baby 🙂 Many thoughts your way during this exciting time. Enjoy it! You’ll be potty training in the blink of an eye!

  2. Beth
    February 3, 2017 / 9:35 pm

    All the internet hugs! Our son is a bit younger than Shea (2 in April) and has just started the 4-5 am wakeups. I can’t even imagine managing that with an infant as well. Everyone loses their cool with their toddlers once in a while, and it’s OK. Toddlers need to know that there is too far, and even parents make mistakes sometimes. We are still dealing with food throwing, and I lost it the night I was trying to make food, and had the 5th thing (all of which he normally eats) thrown on the floor, leaving streaks of marinara sauce across the wood. I yelled at him immediately (not sure gently) whumped him in his crib and left him…Screaming…Without dinner…For a half hour while I calmed down. It happens to all of us or we’d go stark raving mad.

    • Nicole Morrissey
      Author
      February 8, 2017 / 8:57 pm

      I can so relate to the marinara story! Woooooosa! Toddlers!! Gah! They’re so cute yet so trying at times 🙂 Thanks for the squeeze Beth! <3

  3. Stephanie
    February 3, 2017 / 10:07 pm

    We all lose our patience. And mom guilt is real. Potty training is a real test of patience! We try our best, but sometimes fall short. As long as we continue to try to do our best, it’s ok!

    • Nicole Morrissey
      Author
      February 8, 2017 / 8:56 pm

      Thank you, Stephanie! <3

  4. Mia
    February 4, 2017 / 7:21 am

    Nobody is perfect! You did what a lot of people would do in that situation (even did better than some!!). Ask your mom how many times she broke down when you were little..may surprise you! Keep your chin up 🙂

    • Nicole Morrissey
      Author
      February 8, 2017 / 8:56 pm

      Thank you, Mia! I really appreciate it 🙂

  5. Cassie
    February 5, 2017 / 11:07 am

    Oh man, raising kids are tough. Proud of you for taking a mental break and reassessing the situation. I’m terrible at patience too :\ Working on it. Hang in there, mama!

    • Nicole Morrissey
      Author
      February 8, 2017 / 8:56 pm

      Thank you, Cassie!! 🙂

  6. Debbie
    February 5, 2017 / 6:52 pm

    Nicole, you are such a great MOM!! I am writing to tell you I had two daughters at the same age 23 years ago. You will feel like you are going to lose it many, many more times. Look at those beautiful daughters you created. You are learning right along with them. Its so wonderful to read your posts and feel the love you have for your family. Keep up the good work, the memories in the years to come…..

    • Nicole Morrissey
      Author
      February 8, 2017 / 8:55 pm

      So sweet of you, Debbie! Thank you, thank you! <3

  7. February 11, 2017 / 7:12 pm

    I’m not a mom yet, but goodness, no one’s perfect. And you apologized and talked through your mistake with Shea, which I can say was one of the most meaningful things my parents did with me when I was young. You’re doing great <3

    • Nicole Morrissey
      Author
      February 12, 2017 / 11:34 am

      Aw, thank you Katie! Really appreciate it 🙂

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